So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
