i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Don't EVER smell your tampon
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
