i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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