But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
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