he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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