you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize