IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
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