You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I love you. Go after that dick
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
Randomize
