He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
