I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
