my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
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