Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
