dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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