We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
