Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Randomize
