Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
