I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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