Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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