gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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