She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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