IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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