11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
