i don't like sucking hair
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
