Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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