Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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