I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
is that a dick in a sweater?
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