Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
