it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Randomize
