Taylor Swift is so right about you.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Randomize
