You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
In America we eat man semen.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
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