im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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