STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize