your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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