careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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