We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize