I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
