I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
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