I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize