I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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