Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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