Do vagina's smell?
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Randomize
