I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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