i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
