So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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