honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Text me some of your sweat
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize