This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
