Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize