I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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