I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Randomize
