i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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